Meeting the Team
by JellybeanJJ
Summary: The NCIS meets the team from Bones, how different are they really? Bones X over lots of TIVA and BB and bonding between the diiferent teams.
1. Booth and Brennan arrive

Booth and Brennan walked over to the crime scene that was fenced off, Booth groaned looking at the NCIS sedan parked there.

"What's wrong Booth?"

"NCIS is here, the FBI hates them."

"Why do they hate them?"

"They just take over everything and do it their way."

"Don't the FBI do that as well?" asked a puzzled Bones. Booth sighed, "What?! It's true."

"Let's just get to the body then we'll work on cooperation, ok Bones?"

"Fine with me."

Bones and Booth approached the scene to find an angry looking, foreign woman whispering into a geeky man's ear. The expression on the man's face told them that he was very scared. Another man, a little older then the other two, but quite good looking came over to them.

"Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo NCIS, but you can call me Tony" he said holding out his badge.

"Special Agent Seeley Booth FBI, and this is my partner…"

"Dr Temperance Brennan of the Jeffersonian, what's the matter with that woman over there?"

"Oh, that's Ziva, my partner, she's a little upset about some photos I took of her in LA, and McGeek there didn't delete them. Don't worry though, I made hard copies, wanna see?"

"Sure" Booth shrugged

Tony pulled out the three photos of Ziva from LA and gives them to Booth and Brennan. Brennan looks shocked.

"No wonder she is angry, these are extremely sexist photos that promote her as an object for men to google over, instead of her as a woman."

"Ogle, not google." Booth and Tony say simultaneously.

Booth looks at Tony questionably.

"Ziva got that wrong in LA too, she always mixes up her idioms, her excuse is english is a stupid language."

"Why does she think English is stupid?" Bones asked, confused.

"Oh sorry, forgot you're new, she's a liaison officer with NCIS from Mossad."

"Mossad, so she's Israeli. I thought she looked eastern European." commented Bones.

Ziva and McGee walk over, looking oddly at the newcomers.

"Tony, who are these people?" Ziva exclaimed.

"Special Agent Booth FBI and this is Dr Brennan, my partner."

"Well you obviously you know my **annoying** (glares at Tony) partner Tony, I am Officer Ziva David" she said holding out her hand.

Booth and Bones shake her hand.

"And I'm Special Agent Timothy McGee, Gibbs is on his way. Dr Brennan, what kind of doctor are you?"

"I'm an anthropologist., I study bones and determine cause of death."

"So you're like our Duckman." Said Tony, a little excited.

"Duckman?" Booth and Bones asked very confused.

"Oh, Ducky is our medical examiner," explained Ziva, "his real name is Dr Donald Mallard, and let's just say he has many stories."

"Oh, "

"Do you have any squints?"

"Squints? Tony is an idiom of some sort?" Ziva asked confused.

"Don't ask me, I've never heard of it either," Tony replied.

"Squints, you know, people who talk geeky and squint through microscopes all day, squints!"

"Like McGee?"

"Tony, don't be mean to McGee, he's more of a computer turd."

"What?!" Bones and Booth shocked.

"Nerd, Ziva."

"Whatever, I think he means Abby anyway."

"Oh Abby, you'll love Abby," said Tony smiling.

"I don't usually like squints."

"Well everyone loves Abby, even Ziva here, eventually…"

Ziva walks over to Tony and stands right in front of him. She pulls a pink paperclip out of her pocket and starts bending it in Tony's face.

"You sure you want to talk about that now Tony? I thought you liked being alive?"

"A pink paperclip, seriously can't I have a little dignity."

"Well maybe, but it is a lot of fun emasculating you."

"You never emasculate me Zeehvah."

Ziva laughs a little, then looks seriously pointing the paperclip up to his throat. Bones and Booth watch a little shocked. Gibbs comes up behind Tony and gibbs-slaps him.

"DiNozzo, stop annoying your partner."

Tony turns to face Gibbs who is walking.

"But boss, she was trying to kill me, and it's not the first time either."

Gibbs calls back "David, stop trying to murder your partner, I'll tell you if I need to get rid of him."

Gibbs turns around

"Are you just going to stand there or come and investigate this crime scene?"

Ziva, McGee and Tony, run after Gibbs, Bones and Booth look at each other confused follow. Ducky is watching some people pulling a car out of a lake with a tow truck. Bones walks up to Ducky who is looking at the body and Palmer is standing next to him.

"Mr Palmer, could you please go and get the gurney."

"Yes Doctor."

Palmer runs off to van.

"Oh hello, you must be Dr Brennan. I'm Dr Mallard, but please call me Ducky, I'm sure my boy Anthony has told you all about me."

"A little," Bones leans over body, "Male, Caucasian, late 20's to early 30's, time of death approximately 3- 5 days ago, no sign of external bone damage, but we'll be able to observe closer back at the Jeffersonian."

"Very good, Dr Brennan I was told you were the best. We'll send the remains to the Jeffersonian and we'll give other evidence to Abigail, she'll be happy with that."

"Um, would it be alright if took the evidence to the Jeffersonian, it would be easier for the case."

"You can try and convince Gibbs, but he is very stubborn."

"Thanks."

Bones walks off in search of Booth

*********************MEANWHILE***********************

Gibbs walking through to crime scene with McGee, Ziva and Tony on tail.

"McGee, sketch. Ziva, bag and tag. DiNozzo, shoot."

They scatter of and Booth steps forward in front of Gibbs.

"Who the heck are you?"

"Special Agent Seeley Booth FBI."

"Geez, when did the FBI get involved with marine cases."

"It may not be a marine case, so we're taking the remains to the Jeffersonian to examine."

"We're keeping evidence."

Gibbs walks off and Booth goes over to Ziva and Tony who are arguing.

"Tony! Stop looking down my top."

"It's kind of hard not to ziva, not that there's much to see anyway."

"What did you say DiNozzo?

Ziva pulls out a knife from her waist.

"Nothing."

"Well, it better stay that way unless you want to say goodbye to your 'family jewels'"

Tony gulps as Ziva waves a knife in his face the knees him in the groin. He groans as he keels over. Booth looks confused and walks over to McGee.

"Are those two always like that?'

"Like what?" looks up from sketch pad.

"The thing between them."

"Unresolved sexual tension?"

"Yeah."

"Unfortunately yes, but they won't admit it, they literally bit my head off when I wrote a book based on the team, with observations as the key factor."

"You wrote a book?"

"Yeah, you heard of Deep Six?"

"Yeah, but I haven't read it."

"Well if you want to know about the team more I suggest you read it."

"Ok."

Gibbs walks through.

"When you two are finished playing grab ass, you're going to the Jeffersonian with those two" pointing to Booth and Brennan (who is approaching).

"Yes Boss," Ziva and Tony say simultaneously.

They start heading towards the van which Palmer just finished packing up. Tony and Ziva race to the driver side where Ziva gets there first. She is already sitting in the driver seat by the time Bones and Booth arrive and Tony is whining.

"You guys have to stop her driving."

"I don't mind if she drives," Bones remarked.

"Then it's settled, I'm driving. Get in you two."

As soon as they get in they see Tony making the sign of the cross over and over again.

"What are you doing?" quizzed Booth.

"Praying I don't die."

"You are such a little girl Tony, you make a fuss over the littlest things. You two ready to go?"

"Yeah," Booth and Bones answer.

Ziva hits the accelerator hard and they all cling to the side of the car for life.

"I warned you!" gasped Tony as the almost hit a road train on the highway.


	2. The Jeffersonian for 2 minutes

Finally from what seemed an endless drive to Tony, Booth and Bones, thanks to Ziva's driving, they arrived at the Jeffersonian. They walked through the gardens; with the gurney, and into the building, where they came through to the platform where they handed over the remains to a skinny, geeky man who was there. He took them up to the platform. And told Bones:

"I'll get Hodgins to collect his samples from the remains and then I will have bones cleaned for you Dr Brennan."

"Thank you Zack."

Tony whispered to Ziva after observing this new guy.

"Hey Ziva, he's geekier then McGeek! Who would have thought that was possible?"

"I know what you mean Tony, and he didn't even speak in complicated terms…"

"In Geek Speak, Ziva."

"In what?"

"It's the name of the speak the geeks, like McGeek, speak…" Ziva still looks confused, "never mind Ziva."

They turn back to watching and see a curly haired man walking over.

"Hey, you guys must be NCIS, I'm Dr Jack Hodgins your bug and slime guy."

"Are you related to, you know 'The Hodgins'?"

Ziva looks confused by Tony's sudden recognition, and Hodgins sighs.

"Yes, that's me."

"Tony, who are 'The Hodgins'?"

"Big rich family, you know 'The Cantilever Group'?"

"No."

"Don't worry about her, she Israeli so she doesn't know many American Companies, anyway my father used to work with your family"

"What's your name again?"

"Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo and this is…"

Ziva holds out her hand.

"Officer Ziva David, Tony I can speak for myself."

Hodgins shakes it.

"So you're the infamous Anthony DiNozzo Junior"

"Yeah, I got cut off at 12, so that's practically the only reason I work for the government."

"Well I'm escaping it all"

Ziva cuts in.

"You said you were the bug and slime guy, yes?"

"Yeah, it may be creepy but it's very fascinating, why?"

Tony replies getting at what Ziva is onto.

"You're coming with us, you and Abby have a lot of work to do."

"Who's Abby?" Hodgins asks confused.

"She's our forensic scientist, I'm sure you'll love her. Ain't that right Zeevah?"

"Oh, Abby is _lots_ of fun."

"Ok…" he replies nervously, "I just have to get my stuff, so I'll be back in a minute."

Hodgins leaves and a hot girl walks past. Tony whistles.

"Tony!" Ziva says elbowing him, "Stop googling girls!"

Hot girl turns around and confronts him.

"excuse me, but since you were so focused on staring at my ass, you didn't notice a stain on your pants."

Tony looks down at his pants

"Where?"

She pours her coffee on the front of his pants.

"There."

"Ow!" Tony yelps from the heat of the coffee and starts fanning his pants with his hands.

Ziva starts laughing.

"She showed you, Tony. I'm already starting to like these people."

Hodgins comes back looking confused .

"What did you do to piss off Angela?"

"You know THAT girl?"

"Yeah she's my girlfriend."

At this point Ziva is bending over, laughing very hard.

"yeah she's our sketch artist for facial reconstruction, she'll probably stay here with the remains."

Tony looks very relieved.

Ziva looks at her watch.

"I think we should get going now."

"Good idea, Zeevah. Come on Hodgie, Abs is waiting."

Hodgins just looks at him strangely and follows Tony and Ziva as they head for the exit.

"Hey, wait up!" Booth and Brennan are running up behind them.

***************MEANWHILE************

Gibbs walks into Abby's lab with a Caf-Pow, followed by McGee with a box of evidence.

"Gibbs! You brought me my 2 loves! Caf-Pow and evidence."

"There's more evidence coming with Tony and Ziva. Oh and you have a new assistant."

"Gibbs, please don't do this to me again!"

"Sorry Abs, but I don't have a say in this one. It's just for this case though and he is more of a partner, because he has his own lab but I made sure he came here."

"Just for this case?"

Just for this case." Gibbs confirmed.

"Fine, when is he coming?"

Elevator Dings open.

"Now."

Gotta love the geek speak comment!!!! And I could def imagine Angela doing the whole coffee thing!!!!!

I'm sorry I'm soooooo unreliable and I guess lazy but I guess You'll have to live with that if you wanna read my stories.

**PS thanks for the reviews, I know I didn't ask for them but they are cool. **

**Btw you still don't have to give me any but thanks to the people who did (for both stories)!!!!!!**

  


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